Just about a week away...

This next cycle is fast approaching! Come Monday, I'll take my final birth control pill and then await my period. Once that arrives, I'll start taking estrogen 2x a day on cycle day 1. Cycle day 5, I'll make a trip up to the clinic to have my baseline ultrasound done, which will check for residual follicles from last month, make sure my uterus is in good shape, and the blood work will check to make sure my hormones have returned to normal. If all looks good, then on cycle day 13, I'll make another trip up to the clinic for a uterine lining check. If my uterine lining is 7mm or thicker, J will begin administering the nightly progesterone shots in to my hip muscles. Approximately 5-7 days after we begin those shots, they'll do the embryo transfer. At this time, if all goes to plan, it is likely that the transfer would be around October 10, perhaps a day or so later. 10 days after that will be the beta to test for pregnancy.

So...transfer day. We are really hoping that transfer day ends up falling on a weekend so J can be there -- if transfer falls on a week day, he won't be able to come with me due to his work schedule...and I think it goes without saying, we'd be mighty disappointed. Since the intimacy aspect of baby-making is pretty much all but gone by this point in the game, going through the transfer procedure together is as close to intimate as we get with IVF. It's a deeply emotional experience, and it would be very disappointing if the timeline were to deny us that. But, we'll do what we have to do and my boss has offered to take me, should J be unable to go, as I take a sedative pre-transfer and am not allowed (or able) to drive myself home. But, even though I'd have a ride, I'd be alone in the procedure room, which would certainly be less than ideal -- for more reasons than one -- including the fact that I'd be loopy and hard pressed to ask important questions or remember the answers. We'll just have to hope for the best and no matter what, hope that the embryo defrosts well and that procedure itself goes off without a hitch!

I think it feels a bit surreal to us both that this next try is nearly upon us. This attempt feels very different compared to last month, in nearly every way. That being said, we are both feeling quite optimistic and I can only speak for myself, but I think one big reason is because my body has had some time to rest from all of the hell it went through for the fresh IVF cycle last month. Looking back at it, I can't quite believe I put my body through so much in such a short period of time. I mean, I was there, I know it happened but I really pushed the limits and I think having a month and a half to kind of breathe and get our heads "back in the game" can only be a positive thing. We have processed our sad feelings and disappointment from try #1, now we're ready to take on try #2 and we hope hope hope that this is IT for us. I've explained my feelings about try #2 vs try #1 in this way: the doctor has said that we have approximately a 56% chance of success, which is nearly the same odds as flipping a coin. If you've ever flipped a coin, you know that your odds of "winning" (ie having what you call as the coin is flipping through the air actually be what is lying face up in your palm when it lands) increases with every flip. We flipped our coin last month, called "pregnancy" when it was up in the air, but it landed face down, or "no pregnancy." So next month, we'll flip again and hopefully this time, the coin will land in our favor.

Stay tuned, more to come next week!